Dear Martina,

I broke my husband’s penis. I can’t say I enjoy sex with my husband, we’ve been married twenty years and it’s never been great. It’s basically him getting what he wants and then rolling over or leaving the room. When he wants sex he will grope me or even just slip his penis straight in even if I’m asleep.

Until last week, I thought husbands having sex with their wives while they were sleeping was normal. I’ve never questioned it. Sometimes I wake up and know because I’m sticky, other times I wake up during and just wait for it to be over. All that passes through my mind is “at least he won’t want it while I’m awake tomorrow”.

Anyway he’s started watching quite a lot of porn online, which I don’t normally mind because it normally keeps him away from me. This time though it’s given him ideas. He’s penetrated me anally twice now, the first time I thought it was a mistake, the second time I know he meant it and it hurts like hell.

So last night when he tried it again, I was sleeping. He was being very forceful and I wriggled away. I was on my side and he thrust his penis as hard as he could, aiming for my anus, but instead it hit the perineum. The bone between my bum and vagina. Then I heard a cracking sound, he cried out, lashed out at me and rang an ambulance.

He’s home, he has broken his penis and he says it’s all my fault for moving when I should have stayed still. I’m so glad he can’t have sex for 8 weeks but I feel awful for what he’s been through. Don’t tell me to leave him, I would have to leave the money behind and I couldn’t live without my Range Rover and lovely house.


Dear Ball Breaker

Before your last sentence my usual advice would be, get out, go into hiding and screw him for every penny he’s got. Have a Google, see how much we abhor abuse of women of any kind, sexual, physical or mental and this is not normal behaviour. It’s rape and abuse, the fact he broke his penis is his own fault no one else’s, call it Karma.

I would be sympathetic and I would offer advice but if you won’t consider leaving what exactly would help? A shotgun? If money is more important to you than self-respect, a good night’s sleep and standing up to a rapist and abuser then there’s nothing anyone can do, except you. When you decide to leave, the support is there from victim support to refuges where you can hide and be protected.

You will get the money back once the divorce goes through but would you really be able to live without the Range Rover for up to 6 months? Please get in touch if you realise life is too short to sacrifice it for cash.

In the meantime, liquid gold loosens the asshole making anal sex much easier to take. You may want to stock up.

On a very serious note, no one should put up with domestic abuse or sexual abuse of any kind. You will see we work hard to ensure any woman in this situation gets the help she needs. However we can’t help unless you’re prepared to help yourself a little, it’s like giving up a drug.